My story starts in a little town in South Jersey where I was born and raised. I’m what people call an ABC (American-Born Chinese), and I was very lucky to grow up with a big family who lived in the area. My childhood was not perfect by any means, but I’m eternally grateful that my family kept our Cantonese culture and traditions alive while encouraging the newer generations to embrace our American identity as well. I grew up in a musical family so I had no choice but to also love music. Every birthday and holiday was an excuse to host karaoke parties where the adults would blast 90’s Hong Kong songs and encourage the kids to sing our favorite English songs. 

Then suddenly, I was 18, it was time for college, and I was shipped up to Boston. For me, this was a time of deep soul-searching, and for a long time I felt like I wasn’t sure who I was or who I wanted to be. The great thing about having an identity crisis is that you’re forced to examine every single aspect of yourself with intention, and part of that was my cultural identity. I watched a lot of Hong Kong films and listened to Cantonese music during this time, and I found inspiration in Leslie Cheung and Anita Mui, two late Hong Kong stars who pushed the boundaries of gender and sexuality through their music and acting. I built a community of queer and Asian friends in Boston, and by the end of four years I finally felt like I found my people.

Moving to Harrisburg for my first job out of college felt like a fever dream. I was lost for a while, having never lived in a place without an Asian community to connect with before. I felt strange knowing every single person in my cohort at work was white except for me. It wasn’t even a month before I considered moving away because I felt so much like an outsider. Thankfully, I quickly met a few HAAPI members who welcomed me into the community with such warmth and excitement that I couldn’t help but want to stay and watch how big HAAPI will grow. I was very moved by the mission and ambition behind HAAPI to provide a safe space for AAPI in a place where there had not been one before. The very fact that this community exists is a comfort to me, knowing that here, I am seen. Here, I am heard. 

I’m still finding myself. Everyone takes their own pace to discover who they are and their meaning in this world. But as long as there is community, there is support, love, and a home to want to come back to.